Conflicts are natural aspects of human existence.
To have peaceful relationships you have to go through the healthy management of conflict.
So, the first fundamental evolutionary transition regarding the common view of conflict is that in order to manage it in a constructive way, people need to know how to stand in the conflict constructively.
To get straight to the point, it is necessary to go one step further: people must be able to be constructive in the discomfort.
This step is serious business, because it brings the focus to our relationship and the suffering.
The enormous difficulty encountered in developing a positive attitude toward conflict is the deep fear of it, because people are afraid they might be hurt.
So it happens that we manage to handle the problems just to manage our discomfort.
The consequences of this are based on three fundamental errors:
- not recognize the substantial difference between discomfort and problems;
- incorrectly relate to the emotions;
- ignorance about the nature of suffering, we have therefore a bad relation with it.
Thus, one understands better why the change of attitude towards the conflict is so difficult; this is a change in attitude toward suffering.
The construction of social contexts has to take in consideration the constructive conflict as a natural state of the relationship, which means that the discomfort, trouble and anguish should always emerge, knowing that each person operates independently.

 

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Centro Studi Sapienza 
Piazza di Vittorio, 6 
20098 San Giuliano Milanese (MI) 

I also receive in Milan by previous request

For more info send an email to: mediazionecounseling@libero.it

 

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